Dear God, this is Tina from school. If I drunk text you and you’re asleep, don’t text me in the morning…that ship has sailed. I had no idea there was so much butt touching in baseball. Hey Jimmy Jr. Did you see those two squirrels fighting in the courtyard? It includes material that may not be suitable for all ages.Let’s raise our glasses! Now my rash smells like bacon. But it doesn’t itch anymore.Hey, you don’t want to mess with my sister. She’ll wear down your self esteem over a period of years.

I’m compiling a list of people I can mate with to repopulate the Earth. Please don’t tell Mom and Dad. Dr. Yap is dreamy. When he’s looking at my molars, it’s like he’s looking into my soul. Dad, if you believe you’re beautiful, you will be. I did. She grabbed Jimmy Jr’s butt and changed the world. Just when I think I’m out, those cheeks pull me right back in. My hearttttttttt. Just when I think I’m out, those cheeks pull me right back in.

Dad, if you believe you’re beautiful, you will be. I did. Sausage leather belts. We can make this work. We can work out a dating wheel, just like a chore wheel. Let’s put the try in triangle. Give them ridiculous French accents. Buns…sen. Here’s a bunch of numbers. They may look random but they’re my phone number. A pants-off. For me? This is such a snore-gasm.